Alyssa Rae: Infant Orphanage

I was sobbing. And those who know my well know that I hardly ever cry in public.

Before we entered the infant orphanage, our bodyguard/guide explained that there were about 30 infants living in one room. These babies come from all types of situations. Some from mothers who have died from AIDS (roughly 12% of the Malawian population suffers from AIDS, one of the highest rates in Africa.) Other babies were found abandoned in fields, etc. Legally the orphanage can house 20 infants, the one we visited cares for 30 infants.

When I walked through the door, 30 darling babies laid in their cribs, seemingly content. As I walked from crib to crib, I realized the unnatural silence. In a room of 30, not one infant was crying.

Then I held one of the babies.

As I did so, she nuzzled into my shoulder and hugged my neck. When I tried to put her back in her crib, the unnatural silence of the room was shattered as she began to cry. It wasn’t the usual cry of a baby in discomfort, she was screaming like she was being abandoned forever. A caretaker rushed over and put a cheeto in the baby’s hand to try to comfort her, to no avail. (Whenever a baby started to cry, they were given one cheeto, in an attempt to stop their tears.) I picked her up again and she nuzzled back into my shoulder, immediately silent.

I couldn’t bring myself to lay the girl back in her crib. As I picked her back up for the third time, tears began streaming down my own face. I looked into the little girl’s gorgeous brown eyes, trying to imagine the hard times she has already faced at such a young age. All of these children were so starved for human affection.

Two beautiful caretakers hustled from place to place trying to care for all the children. The love they had for the orphans was evident in their faces. I can only imagine how overwhelming it must be for two people to care for 30 infants 24 hours a day.

When my mom came to tell Heather and me it was time to leave, Heather (13) looked up at her crying, and said, “They just need a mom.”

They literally had to push Heather and me out of that orphanage. I want to go back and bring them clean diapers, blankets and bottles. But most of all, I want to go back and just love and hold every baby.